If you boast to your friends and family that your firm has a clear strategy, that you work in a supportive, well organised structure, always know exactly what’s expected of you, that you are respected, and receive encouragement and praise just when they’re due, then you’re probably unique.
It’s infinitely more likely that you have a few things you grumble about.
As human beings, we like to focus the blame on someone else. It’s more helpful if it’s just one person: the longer we make the list, the more we risk concluding that it can’t be that everyone else is wrong, and that maybe we might bear some of the blame ourselves. And it can’t be the people who report to us who’re at fault. That one quickly rebounds to whoever takes responsibility for them, and we know what that means. So it’s the firm and our boss who are lacking.
In this situation, I offer you 3 options.
To begin, please accept that you’re making a choice.
You’re making a choice even if you decide on Option One, which is Do Nothing, carry on as before. In some situations, ‘Carry on as before’ works magnificently well. And it’s up to you. Just bear in mind that, when you make the choice, you’re then responsible for what that choice brings. Don’t be surprised, though, if doing the same as before brings exactly the same results as it did in the past.
Option Two is the Nuclear Option. Leave. People do leave firms. They even leave particular bosses.
Or there’s Option Three, which I ask you to consider. Be your own boss.
I ask you to step back from your situation (always a helpful first move) and to accept that it might be a bit weak of you (I don’t want to be too harsh) for someone with your skills and ability to be waiting for someone else to tell you what to do. You might be selling yourself short.
It doesn’t really matter why more guidance isn’t reaching you; perhaps there simply isn’t a plan to tell you about; perhaps your boss isn’t bursting with ideas or doesn’t set the world on fire when it comes to communication. Whatever the reason, maybe you owe it to yourself to push yourself more, not simply to wait, especially if the only prize you get for waiting is the ability to keep grumbling.
So if there’s blaming to be done, how about blaming yourself for failing to take the controls when you can? If your boss doesn’t treat you with respect, let you know what’s going on and encourage your ideas, and if you find that treatment demeaning, I suggest you recognise that you’re on the spot to choose one of the 3 Options. You can choose to go along with things, or find another job, or you can make a start on doing what you think your boss is failing to do. You can treat yourself with respect. If you act downtrodden, you’ll be downtrodden. Respect your own time, for example, in the way that you feel a good boss would respect your time. That means giving yourself a break when a fair boss would do that, but it also means getting on with things when your idea of a fair boss would expect you to do that.
If the brief isn’t completely clear, you can (gently) submit your view and, while you’re about it, practise your own clear communication skills. That better way of doing things might even catch on.
And if it’s praise you’re missing, you do have to remember that (in most cases) you’re not working for the Salvation Army. If you need it, though, I suggest you find your own way of marking when you think you deserve a pat on the back.
So don’t sit there waiting to be spoon-fed by your boss, you owe it to yourself to do more than that. In fact you don’t just owe it to yourself…
While your boss is blind to his shortcomings, what about the log in your own eye? When you gripe to your reports about your latest frustration, how long will it be before they’re agreeing amongst themselves that you’re just the same yourself? Do you show respect for the people who work for you, keep them informed and welcome their ideas? Does each of your reports feel appreciated?
If you’re frustrated by what you see as your firm’s or your boss’s failure to do what you’d do if you were in charge, I suggest that you make for yourself a list of those shortcomings. Then challenge yourself with the question ‘What can I do about that?’. You might not be in a position to change the whole firm, but perhaps you could make a difference in a smaller part of the organisation. And, after you’ve looked upwards, have a careful look down to make sure you’ve not become a critic who fails to look after their own team.
There’s a neat and happy conclusion to this line of thinking.
When bosses are asked what makes individual employees stand out from the crowd, they never seem to say it’s an ability to follow instructions to the letter. They describe that special person as the ‘self-starter’, who doesn’t wait to be told exactly what to do, but who comes up with ideas and gets to work on them.